What are you standing in?
Several months ago, I was visiting a colleague at her office when the news surfaced that a mutual acquaintance of ours was struggling. The business she was leading closed its doors. It was done and so was she. I was a bit shocked by this news and my colleague looked me right in the eye and assured me
It ran its course
As an entrepreneur facing the daily fears and joys of growing a new business, these words hit me hard and deep. These were heart-piercing words…cold, grave stone words that gave me chills.
Leaders are bombarded by demands and overwhelming requests for their time, resources, brain and heart. Ask any leader a few questions about life or work and you will find them mentioning “balance.” Leaders make choices between work and family, work and health, work and everything else. We are struggling to keep up. We are overspent as a functioning human being and therefore something has to give, something must suffer. Former Labor Secretary, Robert Reich, in his new book Supercapitalism blames globalization for the over taxing of leaders. Warning of the blinding obvious: No sign of globalization coming to a screeching halt is on the horizon. A recent feature article in Fortune magazine tells the bittersweet story of CEO Dominic Orr whose workaholic ways nearly ruined his life. A match lit for all similar stories could illuminate a major U.S. city. The truth is we have a zillion things pulling on us. So…what do you commit to? What do you stand for? Where is your word certain? How does your word show through your actions? Take time to think here.
Where do you stand? As for me, I am a guts-out, beyond-what-is-possible person. When I take a vow, a stand, I am fueled by conscience, discipline, heart. There is no doubt about my intention. I am not deterred by obstacles, nay-sayers, or disappointments. I don’t quit. For decades the words of Theodore Roosevelt have shadowed me: “It is not the critic that counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of good deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.” Make no mistake. I am in the arena.
Are you?
What do you stand for? Being a CEO? Being a great dad? Being a world class operations leader? Being the best partner you can be? How do you stand in this place? What, if anything, could make you quit?
These words:
It ran its course
are indelibly etched on my soul. I am forever changed. Regardless, my stand is my word. I vowed. I am committed.
LOML, may you find your way.
on November 4, 2007 on 10:26 am
It comes as no surprise, having been privileged to know and work with Sue over the years that she is guts out and in the arena. Frankly, there are few I’d rather be in the arena with. Having said that, there comes a time when people need to commit to something – business, family, friends or loved ones when they don’t think it’s possible.
In the spine-chilling book Touching the Void, Joe Simpson explores the very moment of commitment. As he hangs helplessly from a life-giving rope help by his climbing partner Simon Yates, Simpson feels his commitment viscerally. After hours, Yates makes a unilateral decision to cut the rope in an attempt to save at least one life. Yates survives of his own accord beyond all odds.
Whether we realize it or not, many of us are tethered to others in life. In rare instances, as in the book, those ties are life giving. In more frequent occurrences, they are symbols of a partnership that transcends the every-day bucket-of-chum that life hands us.
Take a moment to think about your tethers – both those you provide and those you rely on. Feel the importance of those tethers, for one day you may be counting on them, or being asked not to cut the rope.
Grace knows, I will not cut the rope.
on November 11, 2007 on 11:50 am
I have read that book, Jim. I’m glad you brought it up in this context. I am not and have never been a quitter. Although I have made choices to move on, and in the refocus I’ve had to quit some things: some people, some habits, some jobs.
(Reminds me of the book Sue recommended to me, The Dip!).
It’s interesting how some people will interpret your choices. I’ve come to learn that those people who think you’re a flake, or who don’t agree with your choices or the strength it took to make them, have the issue, and the issue is not that my choice was wrong.
Regardless, you have to stay in the wring. I was once told be an executive director who had put me in an untennable situation leading middle managers toward consensus and organizational influence without much senior management support, that you could tell a leader by how many arrows she had in her back.
Seems harsh. Is that necessarily true? Perhaps he was validating the stand I was taking and trusted that I wouldn’t give up in the face of difficulty.
How about asking for help? That takes strength too. I was recently struggling with an unexplained illness. A strong and wonderful friend got me to the hospital and stayed with me all night, advocating for my care, keeping me company, comforting me in pain. Knowing how and when to ask for help in the wring is important too.
Thanks for putting these ideas for us to ponder. Keep swinging!
on November 28, 2007 on 5:04 pm
Leaders can only lead if others choose to follow them. Leadership is not self-declared or bestowed upon you. It is earned. Leaders are not measured by the arrows in their backs, but by the arrows taken in the chest as they forge a new path to a new and bold place….a place others would not otherwise go. If leaders have arrows in their back, they are not leading, they are running away – perhaps as your senior managers were doing.
Thanks for your perspective and the assurance that others recognize what it’s all about. Focus on what is important today…..and tomorrow.